Well, today being the cheesy, sappy over-commercialized Day-O-Love, I thought I would pause and reflect about the 2 sweetest loves in my life. My Matt & my Ava. These loves are not cheesy, nor are the sappy, and we're too poor for them to be over-commercialized! I am so unbelievably, utterly grateful for these lives that God has allowed to melt into mine.
My husband and I have had quite the story. We met on the first day of class at Lee University in August of 1998. We sat across the room from each other in New Testament class but somehow we each noticed each other. I noticed his bleach blond hair (actually cool back then!!) and thought he might even be in a band (not even close on that one :) He noticed my flip flops b/c he had never seen someone wearing flip flops with jeans. I shared a prayer request for a friend with crohn's & he came up to me after class & nervously blurted out "I have crohns" and then he walked away--flustered and embarrassed. I walked away and thought, that was the cutest boy I've ever seen. The rest as they say is history. We were inseparable friends for a year, hated each other for 4 months, dated for 2 years, engaged for one very LLLOOOONNNNGGGG year. And then on June 28, 2002 I married that cute boy & he has changed my life forever. I love him more than I love anything else in this whole world. I will love him until the day I die. The way that he loves me & is patient with my crazy self is unreal. I can't wait to spend the rest of my days with my Matt. I love you baby!
Ava has the most tender place in my heart. There is something about a Mother's love for her child that you really just can't explain until you hold your baby for the first time. I never really felt bonded with Ava when she was in my womb. I loved her, of course. But I never experienced those feelings that some pregnant women talk about--feelings of already intimately knowing their baby & feeling this deep soul connection with them. I think it all boiled down to me being afraid that something would happen to her & if I was overly connected I might not be able to survive if something did happen. So I loved her, but cautiously. But when she arrived into this world & Matt carried her over to me & I looked at her perfect, beautiful face I was absolutely overwhelmed with the deepest love I could ever experience. It all just clicked. She was mine & I was hers. This fierce protective force was birthed in me that day & I know that I will spend the rest of my life praying for, hoping, dreaming, loving and protecting this sweet little life. That first month was the hardest time of my life & it took time for us to figure each other out, but I remember the day where everything had kind of settled down & we were learning each other. It was the sweetest experience for me. Love takes time--even with the ones we love the fastest & hardest.
Thank you Father for loving me so much that you sent your Son to die on a cross for me so that I could experience the greatest love of all time--Yours. And through your love for me you have opened the door for me to experience just a glimpse of that perfect love through my relationships with Matt & Ava. Thank you for loving me first. Thank you for loving me last. Thank you for loving me forever.
